Fetch-failure Aficionado T-Shirts

"I'm starting to think she doesn't want that ball."

Playing Fetch.

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

'That was fun!'

'Fetch.'

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"I throw this ball, you go get it and bring it back — everything else will fall into place."

Tiny dog catches frisbee that spins him around in circles.

'Super Dog'

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

A man and his dog

"I'm working from home today."

"A little help, please."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

"Where's the ball? Where's the ball?"

Super hero dog.

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

Boy and his dog

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

"Have you tried biting him?"

"Throw, fetch, throw, fetch, throw, fetch. It all seems so obsessive-compulsive."

Frizzbee statue.

"But this time, Lucky, when I throw the ball... you bring it back!"

'I'll fetch your newspaper and your pipe, but the slippers thing is just too kinky.'

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

'...Sometimes the sheer monotony of it all just gets me down.'

'Max and I have a give and take relationship. He sniffs my butt...and I let him.'

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

'Tired of fetching?'