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Have A Whale Of A Christmas

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Elfie Stick

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

"I could get used to working remotely."

"And my client will be seeking significant damages for being mistakenly placed in the naughty column!"

'Maybe there is something in all this global warming stuff.'

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

Christmas on Other Planets.

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

The Reindeer Strike

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

'I get that reaction a lot.'

"I've made a terrible mistake."

"We don't use good and bad lists anymore. Now we have stupid, really stupid and completely nuts lists."

"Hi, my name is Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "And I have a drinking problem." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph." "Hi Rudolph."

A few post-Christmas options for Santa.

'Leave the Iranian airspace at once!'

Merry Sisyphus - Christmas pudding being pushed up a mountain.

Rudolph With His Nose So Bright.

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer had used to have a very shinysun-seekingtreacherouscharitablefame-seeking mobile nose

He Sees You When You're Sleeping

"Dear Santa, This Christmas please send clothes for all those poor naked girls on daddy's computer. Love, Veronica"

Thanksgiving Game Highlights

Roscoe's Great Escape

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

“Stop avoiding me. I know when you are sleeping. I know when you are awake.”