Festive Frolicer T-Shirts

Ice skater

Chase me, chase me cows.

Night of the Latkes

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

'But, Mom. Think of all the leftovers he can thankfully eliminate.'

Panettone

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

Turkey Autopsy

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

"Anything but milk and cookies."

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

May your Christmas be full of harmony

'Bird Watching is fun, but it tends to make me salivate...'

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"Call me selfish if you want, but I have no issue with spoiling the farmer's Christmas lunch: I'm out of here..."

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

Christmas Drinks 'n' Nibbles System

Twas the week before Christmas and all thru the house

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

"The spare sack? After a million warm beers and pieces of fruit cake...you'd have a spare sack too!"

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

'That'll be all the mince pies and sherry!'

"Our seasonal special is spiced pumpkin apple butternut squash ale. Would you like that in a frosted mug or over ice cream?"

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"