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Rabbi on the Roof with Dreidels

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

Raised by Dogs

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

Well... Tis the season to be jolly!

'We found you in a cabbage!'

'Hon, I'm home!'

Tequila Mockingbird

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

"Maybe I'm aiming too high...maybe 'saving for a cool car' is too hard."

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

'Guess who's teething?'

"Do you feel your eyes have changed any since your last visit?" "No. They seem to be ho, ho, ho, holding their own."

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"I'm sorry, but your child just isn't very sharp. But don't worry. It's perfectly natural."

"Relax, he could just be looking for fun."

'That's what I'm talkin' about!'

'Henry, cut that out.'

'You've made a breakthrough in FINANCIAL research?', 'Yep! - I split the ATM!'

"What?!"

Blues for now.

Sure, snoring is a big issue at our house too: you've seen the size of my dad's nose...

Beer Lunch

"When you said we were going to push the boat out tonight, I thought you meant we were going to a fancy restaurant!"

'Hi! I'm a freshman -- when do I get corrupted?'

Under New Mismanagement

"Oh you kids and that cursed painting in the closet keep me young."

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

Sawrd Fighting

Clairvoyant - I want to divorce my husband. He's having an affair next week.

"Really, yes, I'm on a diet too: I need to almost double my summer weight before the start of the winter hibernation..."

Pastoral Choirs