Fake Id Aficionado Gifts

181 yeard old, huh? This is the worst fake I.D. I've ever seen. And that beard! Ha! Nice try, Mr.... Uhh... 'Van Winkle.'

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."

"I've edited your Wikipedia entry again, Sadie. You're about to be inundated with phone calls from the press." "Whatever, geek-boy." "You're now the world's foremost authority on Turkey leprosy, the disease that's threatening to ruin the holidays." "No one'll believe that." "Oh yeah? I wrote a Wikipedia page for Turkey leprosy, too, along with examples of all the historical figures it's killed, such as the Archduke of Crushistan." "There is no 'Crushistan.'" "I've written a Wikipedia entry for C

BREAKING FAKE NEWS

'Pick a business card.'

"Identity theft hotline? Yes, it's Dracula again. Millions of people are still stealing my identity on Halloween."

"It's all show-as soon as Marks gone he switches off the football and reads Proust..."

"Estella, you have the two most beautiful eyes in the world."

"No one knows his identity. He just turns up, cuts your grass, then departs without leaving his name. They call him the Lawn Ranger."

"Whoa, whoa – for all I know you contaminated the sample."

"Take it. It's the dress code."

Cloning Convention - "Make mine a double."

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

"How's it going with the human cloning?"

Fake News, 50 cents.

Secret Identity Theft.

Happy-Go-Lucky-Father-Of-Two-Avid-Golfer-Longtime-Magnetic-Tape-Salesman-Kiwanis-Member or Thomas Pynchon?

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

"Sorry, I don't work here."

Ask a Silly Question, Get A Silly Answer

'They're praying the school doesn't find out that they've been pretending to be religious.'

'Where's Beiber?'

'... and then Peter was Mr. McGregor...'

CLONE BAG

'Of course he reminds you of yourself at his age -- he's your clone.'

Man flattered into buying by a frenchwoman

Giant Magician's Rabbit.

I Was Married to Banksy.

Lady flattering an amateur man of the arts

To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. Hey Rudy, it's me. Long time no talk. How are you these days? Lemont? From Berkeley? Tap tap tap tap. Yeah. Man … Putnam Hall 1993. Those were the days. What ever happened to our roommate Ken? Tap tap tap tap tap tap. Divided Airlines. Divided Airlines. You know, that freak who was always writing articles about "news" and junk for the school paper ... That MORON who didn't know a Gameboy from a GameGear ... That big baby whose mommy was always calling to check

"It's Albert's revamped version of the old 'arrow through the head' gag, but it still needs a bit of work."

Digital imaging.

Valerie thrived in an internet community that had no idea she was a chicken...

Human cloning - 'Do you remember the access code?' - 'Don't ask me, I am you.'

'Season of Farce'