Extraterrestrial Epicurean Gifts

"The book, How to Serve Man! It's. . . It's a cook book, filled with recipes that use MSG and transfats!"

'Now, if you can get them when they're still in the clamshell, their adrenalin is way higher which enhances the taste. In fact, here comes one right now!'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

How am I abducting?

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

Watch the skies: UFO buffs all stare at the sky, yet alien is amongst them.

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

Holiday Supplies

'Hello Mr Preston? This is an ALIEN speaking. We have landed in your paddock. We have mutilated your cows. We have made loud crashing noises...what the hell is on your TV that's so special?'

"Wow! You do have a triple A membership!"

Elevator Music

"A glimpse into a cartoon character's dressing room..."

An alien tries to hitch a lift at the side of the road

Welcome: Skeptics Society

"We found three sort-of Earthlike planets around a nearby star." "Do you think any of them have video games?" "I've been trying to work out the odds of an intelligent species arising and evolving thumbs capable of holding an X-box controller." "Proof of video games would change everything." "I wonder what the aliens on those planets consider sexy." "Living beings creating simulated beings they can smash is the hallmark of an intelligent species."

Giorgio A. Tsoukalos - Ancient Aliens

"You're getting close. This is the gift shop."

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

' Can I borrow change for the bus? With the cost of gas, I just can't justify buzzing around the city in that thing.'

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

"You arrived as bottom-feeders, but you shall leave as bottom-gourmands."

"They're very time-sensitive."