Exotic Trekker T-Shirts

Camels going through a toll booth

'What zip code are we in now?'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"When troubles begin to take their toll, it’s nice to take a little stroll!"

Sport Utility Boot.

"I'd like to book 10 days going anywhere they've never heard of Brexit."

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

Travel Agency: Pacific time cures all ills.

'I need it for my electric blanket.'

Awaiting the sensation of a short sharp shock

"This patient must be really rich! He brought back the most extravagant illnesses from exotic holiday spots."

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

'The Tropic Resort gives you a choice, Madam, geckos or big, hairy spiders...'

The Tourist

"Well Carter, according to the map, this is where the Rainforest begins."

Couples Riding an Elephant

'About this trip to the Amazon jungle...I want my money back!'

Not in. Take 1 aspirin and call in morning.

"Honey ... let’s never ... ever ... do this ... again."

'I know you like adventure holidays, but when did you say these islands were discovered.'

'The meaning of life? Sorry, kid, you're on the wrong mountain - I'm the guru of handy household tips!'

'You don't know how grateful I am to have someone to talk to.'

'Dysentery or non-dysentery section?'

'Ladies and gentlemen, the seat belt sign has been turned off - Ding! I mean on - Ding! Oops, there it goes off again - Ding! no wait, now it's on - Ding! Ok, I think it's off again - Ding! Nope, now it's back on - Ding! Ding!'

The Fruit Bearers - For Beardsley's Story 'Under the Hill'

People who should not hike...

'Here's an opportunity: Ride a donkey into Mexico, become a citizen, and then sneek back across the border and get a job.'

'Sucker.'

Botany week in Brazil

Only Spocks

Ramblers' Association Notices - Long List.

Hansel & Gretal Breadcrumbs for trailblazers...Never lost again!