European Community Buff Gifts

The burden of carrying the Euro.

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'John is watching the game under protest.'

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

Dracula vacationing in Venice feeding bats in the Piazza of St. Mark.

With no clear winner, the debate ended in a tie breaker.

"You are responsible for the refugee crisis!"

Tipping Pain Chart

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

Presenter Auditions.

'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'

The Clinton Campaign, post-mid-September

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

'Fred, with the market off over 500 points, we thought we might modify your call-in program today.'

"Welcome to 'All About the Media,' where members of the media discuss the role of the media in media coverage of the media."

"We've had too much rain - they don't have enough - we'll sell our rain and make millions!"

Pickle

'I'm a voice over artist.'

'Daddy! There's a Politician in my closet!'

Obtaining a degree in TV Broadcasting.

'If elected, I promise to do my darndest to get re-elected.'

'If the following program sounds silly, it's because it's a a paid political announcement....'

"A survey found 82% of people think surveys are a waste of time."

"They want to see more snow on your hat next time. . . ."

If I survive this, I'm reinventing myself as a television pundit.

"If they shorten political campaigns, what will we do for entertainment?"

Euro Collapse

'Day is day and night is night. That's the opinion of the management of this station. Here with a rebuttal, is attorney...'

'This is just a thought, but maybe we could try animated anchormen.'

VOTE, 'I'll never lie to you, and this time I mean it!'

'It's a growth industry' (tulips from Amsterdam).

'Rain, rain, go away, come again another day'

'You're going to stitch me up in this interview aren't you?'

'Sorry buddy, read the sign. That means no ifs, ands, or buts.'

'Those are my views on the election, but perhaps you'd like to get a second doctors opinion.'