Equation Genius T-Shirts

'None of the questions deserved an answer.'

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"Ah, ha! The universe IS expanding! I can't find my glasses anywhere!"

"It's called geometry, Mum."

"I hate negative numbers, and I'll stop at nothing to avoid them."

"Quick! The ideas are hatching!"

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

Bioengineering Lab, I put a little Dachshund DNA into a rabbit. Hare extensions!

'Everyone's using your theorem, Pythagoras. I told you you should have patented it.'

'DNA...nature's bar code.'

"Say, do you have time between all that DNA research to invent a non-smelly sock."

"I can count to 20...Without taking off my shoes."

'ADN'

Money Tree

"I've devised a new paternity test, or as I call it, a pop quiz."

'This changes everything -- I found a loophole in the genetic code!'

"We could try reversing the drug's side effects with gene therapy, but we don't want to get into trouble with the SPCA."

Two words, boss: Virtual reality. We glue virtual reality goggles to our coffee mugs. Come again? When patrons sip their Himalayan mochas, they'll think they're dangling from a cliff in the Himalayan mountains. People will come from Miles around! People will throw up for miles around. We'll give patrons mops that double as virtual reality hockey sticks. This conversation is virtually over.

The dna double helix, with a human family taking the place of the dna rungs.

The irony is that Euclid himself is way out of shape.

"If you were truly blessed by genius, it wouldn't end there, believe you me!"

"Another advantage of genetic engineering: viruses you can see."

Where baby grand pianos come from.

'Take me to the FBI...Do I have a story to tell about Novox Genlab!'

"What if we stow the 'Star Wars' crap for five seconds, Timmy, and get to the geometry?"

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

Mendel and the Pea.

DNA Test

'If we could just add one more gene to make the skeptical customer trust us.'

"He thinks he's so smart with his 360 degrees!"

I use spell check for all the answers on my math story problems.

'Quick! Name the capitol of North Dakota! What is an isosceles triangle? How high is mount everest? Think! You did study, didn't you, young man?'

"And you laughed when I had it installed."

"I've discovered the gene that makes you such an idiot."