Educational Author Pillows

'Well, it's official. The entire catalogue has to be dumbed down again!'

A Puppet Named Juan

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Hate Platforms

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"You're fired."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Lynching on social media

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

Ethics exam cheater.

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Now leaving designated Free Speech Zone. Shut it!

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

Fear/Knowledge

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

Campaign for Plain English

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."