Economist Pillows

"On Wall Street today, news of lower interest rates sent the stock market up, but then the expectation that these rates would be inflationary sent the market down, until the realization that lower rates might stimulate the sluggish economy pushed the mark

Hour of rising vs worm acquisition.

"And this is where we adjust the interest rate."

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"There, there it is again - the invisible hand of the marketplace giving us the finger."

"Now we just have to sit back and wait for the Fed to bail us out."

"I'm getting subtle hints of what the Fed might do."

'Was it Nietzsche who said, whatever doesn't kill your portfolio makes it stronger?'

"How do you stay so calm about the stock market?"

ChairWOman of the Federal Reserve.

"On Wall Street today, the stock market corrected its previous correction, and is pretty sure it's got it right this time."

"But on the positive side, money can't buy happiness, so who cares?"

'I see your investments going up but it's not clear which ones or when.'

'My advice is: Don't put all your eggs in one basket.'

How To Deal With The Upcoming Recession, Inflation, Depression, Ice Age, Greenhouse Effect, Energy Crunch, Population Explosion, and Complete End of the World in the Year 2000.

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'You talked about 'Fannie Mae' in your sleep again!'

Had volumes of data at my fingertips and still didn't see this one coming.

"That would look really good in my office."

"Analysts blamed the market's volatility on computer-directed trading while computers blamed it on analyst-directed trading."

'Interest rates are up. Should that concern us?'

"Today on Wall Street, yesterday's panic selling was replaced by panic buying."

'I led a long and happy life. Twenty business cycles.'

News on television: 'On Wall Street, stocks rebounded on news that 'up' and 'down' are just states of mind.'

"Have you considered short-term treasurys?"

Dollar: Warning - May cause excessive greed, loss of human empathy and disregard for vital environmental systems.

'I find if I'm the first one in and the first one out, Ponzi schemes can be very lucrative.'

'Your best hedge against a down market is having lots of money.'

"The market was doing so well I decided not to hibernate this year."

Rishi Sunak

"Today, stocks dropped on news the new federal reserve chief, Janet Yellen, is a 'rookie'."

"Bitcoin Explained"

The Distribution of Wealth in the United States Expressed as Peanut Butter in a Sandwich.

"Come in, Wilson. I've traded my phone for some booze. Just another unexpected consequence of the breakup of AT&T."

"Regarding earnings guidance, as my mother used to say: 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything'. I'll be shutting up now."