Economic Storytellers T-Shirts

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

"He'll never win this negotiation. He's saddled with numbers...but we have anecdotes."

"Now the board will hear from Todd from Accounting with his free verse composition 'My Mistress, Brash and Beguiling – the Third Quarter Numbers.'"

Wall of Office Memories

Snail: 'Do you mean to tell me I'm not a credible author?!'

'The Final Merger'

'There's a bear on line one and a bull on line two. Who do you want me to put through first?'

Dollars Press Conference

Those who fail to learn from the past will be forced to relive it.

Pandora's box.

'I eliminated all the platitudes and cliche statements, from your mission statement, and I'm left with this blank sheet of paper.'

'Figures can be misleading - So I've written a song which I think expresses the real story of the firms performance this quarter.'

Never mind spring. What do you predict for the economy?

"And after the prime rate declined by half a point, the Dow rose by thirty-two, guess what happened to Goose and Fox?"

"At last they paid off their sub-prime fairy-tale and lived happily ever after."

Financial Bailout Required.

Turning a business graph around to get a positive reading.

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

'The global economy is fragile and mysterious, folks... kind of like Tinkerbell in 'Peter Pan.' When people stopped believing in the magic, Tinkerbell almost died. So it's up to us to invent a better supernatural creature to believe in!'

'If you kiss me, I'll cause the Dow Jones Industrial Average to soar, manufacturing and trade data to re-accelerate, and housing to rebound significantly throughout the remainder of this and the next quarter.'

"I am reminded of a morbidly depressing anecdote. . ."

I know it's unfashionable to say this...but money actually makes me very happy.

"Well, that's not a good market indicator."

You think you have feelings of worthlessness? You ought to see my portfolio!

'I can't take all the credit. My childhood imaginary friend picked a lot of my stocks.'

"Once upon a time, gold was 60 pounds an ounce."

"And that's how Twitter almost crashed the Dow."

Business Fairy Tales.

Big Bad Wolf Foreclosure.

Foreclosure

Italy Shackled by the Euro Debt Crisis

'Stocks today remained unchanged on news 'the more things change, the more they stay the same''

Lemonade stall gone bankrupt.

'I'm too tired to hear the whole story. Who wins, the bear or the bull?'