Economic Planning Mugs

'Wow! You weren't exaggerating when you said your company had a high cash burn rate!'

'Dad, you sold me on some bum investments.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

The day the stock market went UP.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

Profit

'Please remember that these figures could be off as much as two dollars.'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

Watering Money

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

"One year closer to college!"

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

"Cash, Jordan. That's what separates man from the apes."

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"