Duck Humorists Prints

"I haven't slept well since you pointed out that these modeling sessions are a form of betrayal."

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

"Yes, one is a dog."

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

Hats and Food

No Soliciting

"Scuba cow"

'Jurassic Pork.'

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

''What's in the bag, lady?''

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

No jay walking.

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

Northeastern Deer/Southwestern Deer

"You might want to start bringing more carrots home, dear. I think I have an ingrown hare."

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'