Downsizing Dynamo Pillows

"My super powers are listening and downsizing my life."

Jack of all trades

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

"Why do you need so many computers?" "One for billing, one for stock control, one for human resources, one for financial management..."

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

"I hoped you'd change your hobby when you became a father"

"I'm starting my own delivery service. Is there anything you want to borrow from my Dad?!"

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

"Lovely dovetail."

'You say you type 80 words a minute ... Actually, that's not at all important...!'

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

A holiday at home

Engineer on the move.

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

Wallpapering with Nails

"I've been on a diet for 5 weeks and can safely tell you that I've lost 5 weeks."

'The kids are on a hunger strike, I'm on a diet, and you're on your own.'

Football.

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

Cut out and keep your own D.I.Y expert.

Thor's Other Tools

Origami time!

Shop Lifting

'Marcus could we try it again with a little less gusto this time.'

Handy-lion

Reality home-improvement show.

'According to my count, he sticked 23, gloved 18 and ate 5.'

'I have a very demanding and stressful job. I'd quit but the stress caused me to lose two dress sizes.'