Dog-loving Investor T-Shirts

'I'd recommend a portfolio of 35% stocks, 40% bonds and 25% dog biscuits.'

I like you and I like your company!

"What these product ideas lack is a little bite."

"Now, now, Harrison, we all start somewhere."

a new hire signing a loyalty oath

'But he doesn't want to chase sticks - He likes to follow the stock market!'

'Catch any good mice lately?'

Maybe it's time to stop giving our bones to a broker and start burying them in the backyard again.

"He's a bad dog, but a good CEO."

"This company isn't big enough for two anthropomorphic dogs."

'So much for the will! Now, before you start celebrating, I suggest you think about inheritance taxes, because, according to my calculations, you will be left with. . ."

'Oh my God, dog biscuits are down!'

"I only invest in alternative meat products, so I reject the terms 'Bull' and 'Bear'."

"I hope you've had as much fun training me as I've had being trained."

'Gentlemen, circle around on the spot several times and be seated.' - At the dog AGM

'It's a good living. They train you to do default swaps and you get paid in seals.'

"It all started out just fetching sticks, and the business sort of grew from there."

'I should warn you. I can sense fear.'

'The Dow is going up, the Dow is going down, the Dow is...'

"Good boy."

"Darby, Bandit, Piper & Spike - Dogs."

"Manager does not do tricks."

'Stocks rose on news of a proposal to have greed' dropped from the seven cardinal sins.'

'Can you be more specific? Are you pointing at IBM, IMCLONE, INTEL...?'

"I must admit, this talk of outsourcing excites me. Especially the 'out' part."

'...anything else, sir?'

First savings & bone.

'I actually make a lot more money as a bookmaker than I ever did as a race horse...'

'Do you have a dog biscuit ETF, chew toy ETF, rawhide bone eTF. . .?'

Dog has a hi-yeild inbox full of bones.

Investments: Welcome Vegans! As about our '100% Plant-Based Commodities Fund.'

Investments: New - Starred Items In Your Portfolio Mean 'Suitable For Vegans'.

"Turner, I'm putting you on a shorter leash."

FoodWaterOnline Stock Trading Tips.

'The starred item in your investment portfolio mean 'suitable for vegans'.'