Dog Educator T-Shirts

"Okay, that's enough Physics for one day. Take a break and chase your tails."

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

I think you started off sending him the wrong message when you named him Alpha.

Guide Dogs

'I signed him up in obedience school, but all he did was play hooky.'

'I tried to teach him to shake, but he'd rather do 'high fives'.'

"It isn't quite how I pictured it, either."

Dog Quiz

"Just pay attention and you might learn a few new tricks."

Discipline at Doggy School

A cat leading a dog leading a man

'Today, students, we will discuss lameness in fish.'

Enable your dog to finish the pursuit of the squirrel...Teach your dog how to easily uncork the wine...They can prepare your taxes for you.....and feed themselves.

"He still isn't paper trained, but I got him rug trained."

'Thank goodness it's Friday!'

'Sandra missed school today because of this appointment. Will you please write an excuse note for her?"

Treacherous moments in evolution

'The last thing I knew he was on a plane to an obedience school in Omaha!'

"Goodness gracious no, I didn't go to a public puppy-school: I went to an elite private puppy-school..."

'I told him to get down.'

'It's very advanced. They start with simple commands - sit, come, fetch - and then work up to retrieving lost computer files.'

Elevator: Up, Stay, and Lay Down.

"Bad dog!"

Rockwell School

'If a camel can go 500 miles without water... how far can he go with water?'

'Son, you're old enough now to know the truth...The red dot...It isn't real.'

"Of course I'm supposed to be on it. It's Barkolounger."

"Instead of chasing them like a madman, just ask the squirrels if they’d like to play with you."

Takin playing dead to a new level, Riley takes on Shakespeare.

The Four Stages of Cruelty - First stage.