Digibyte Defender Mugs

Internet Security Is So Good It's Even Safe From You

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

Privacy Conference Security

"The date protection policy is all about access to information, and we all know information is POWER!"

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

Privacy - Surveillance

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

'Jeff is a tackle on his online college football team.'

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

"Hack back with all you've got!"

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

Workers are running out of one door labeled 'Reactive Business Intelligence,' while another worker in the next room sits calmly behind a door with a sign that reads, 'Proactive Business Intelligence.'

Things that go beep in the night.

"I want one that detects intrusions by hackers, then blows their computers to bits!"

"That didn't work either! I'm telling you, this is one AGGRESSIVE virus!"

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

Fighting the Zika Virus

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"

Cartoonist Stabbed By Censorship Swords

"They're worse than carpenter ants. We have hacker ants."

'I have the MRI scan of your brain. The right hemisphere is clogged with computer passwords.'

'We have to be forthright with the public. We have to have their confidence. We have to convince them we're working for the common good. Then we can invade their privacy.'

Bob soon began to hate his new anti-spam software.

"No, I'm not writing a short story. That's my password."

'Gimme all your cache!'

Facial Recognition

Facebook/Cambridge Analytica Scandal

"Your call may be monitored by the CIA, NSA, Russians, Chinese, space aliens..."

"Hi, I'm the new IT-security-expert! Where is your server room? I want to see if I can overcome your firewall!"