Delegation Virtuoso Pillows

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

Problems roll off my back and slide into Plotkins' office.

"Who called this meeting again?"

An informed voter is a good voter

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

“Someone is not muted. I'm still hearing ambient noise. Please mute your device.”

'Ah, Williams, are you familiar with the term ‘Poisoned Chalice'?'

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"Just put that in my, 'I'll get to it when I can, I'm only human' pile."

"Is there a way to disable Narcissus' self-view?"

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

"It's my conscience... It's all achy"

'Aha! I think I figured out the headache problem, one of these things is pointed the other way. This would explain the double vision.'

"At work, we've switched to video calls for meetings, so my productivity has shot up exponentially. . ."

"This one's for volunteering for field trips. This one's for planning the class holiday parties. . ."

I know I'm not qualified for the job, but watch my incredible video resume anyway. It got an Honorable Mention at Cannes!

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

"It's my support group for Zoom fatigue syndrome."

Now Available....Zoom Etiquette

"An excellent interview Mr Twinglestop, now is there anything you'd like to ask me. . . Apart from home to switch off your 'cat filter'?"

'I'm afraid the motion has been carried and you lost.'

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

"The pandemic has pushed us to revolutionize how we connect."

"By the way, about your presentation...Management has made a surprise visit."

"Now, how many of you liked the viola player best?"

"You've got to give Hunter top marks for presentation."

Barking From Home

"I'll have my people zoom your people."

"The secret of time management? Never take anyone off hold."

"If you were truly blessed by genius, it wouldn't end there, believe you me!"

"I'm no longer cleaning my whole apartment. . . Just the 'Zoom Zone.'"

"… and the last item on the pre-nuptial aggreement is, … he wants final cut on all home videos."