Daughter To Father T-Shirts

"I know you worry about me speeding when I borrow your car, Daddy. So, this evening I kept the handbrake on all the way home!"

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

Robot Parts $5

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

Butterfly Woman

Killer Executive Suits.

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Prize vegetables.

'I have this fear of the real world...'

Skipping Horse

I should be a writer when I grow up...

The Busy Gardener

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I built this tree house for my kids. But it's so private, I've decided to use it as my home office."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Remote control pirate bully

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"