Data Broker T-Shirts

"Oh, Johnny. I feel like I'm beginning to know you almost as well as Facebook does!"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

The day the stock market went UP.

The president's men

A fight in the Boardroom.

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Sales chart is buildings in background.

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

"We structured the deal so it won't make any sense to you."

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

Day trading.

World Economic Crisis.

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

"Good invisible exports figures this quarter, sir."

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

“It's $195 million. Now, I know what you're thinking: 'OK, what's the catch?'”

Why markets crash.

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

"He's quick with the birds and bees stuff, but then comes the bulls and the bears..."

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'