Decorate their room or office with a print that celebrates their debating talent—sharp, witty, and sure to spark conversation in any space.
You're still on that computer? I'm waiting for some rube to respond to my latest argument. Word of advice, Sadie: passion is wonderful. But when the object of your passion is not right in front of you, then thinking about it is an unhealthy obsession. That's why it's best to distract oneself with multiple passions and their best friends. Wait ... what? ... I mean multiple websites. Maybe I CAN'T be satisfied by just one endless online argument.
"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."
Dialogue
'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'
The Proust of Twitter
"Now that's a win."
"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."
My new laptop is nicer than your new laptop. I'm not going to get into a competition about whose new laptop is nicer. The one I replaced is nicer than the one you replaced. Stop it.
"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr
"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"
"We broke up. I wanted a proprietary platform - she wanted open source."
'Don't bite. They're trolling again.'
"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."
"On the contrary, Bosworth, it's YOU who has lost all perspective."
Oz Debating Society. You can't refute everything I say just by call it a "straw man" argument.
'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'
"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"
The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'And let such sacrilege go uncontested? Never! I demand equal time for alternate explanations of things.'
"I had a great weekend... My Grandpa talked about the war again and my Dad about his most daring facebook comments!"
'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'
Debating Society. I can accept that money is speech as long as we can agree that some spending is like yelling fire in a theater.
A bunch of global warming skeptics want to join eco club. It's a school organization. You have to let them in. But they just want to harass us with selective facts! Today: Eco club. So? Debate is good. You have :An Inconvenient Truth" to counter their arguments. Oh. Great. Now we'll have to read it.
Like Minded
And now, for a rebuttal.
'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'
Too many people post comments in the heat of anger. They strike while the ire is hot!
Approved Debate Questions
Nearly a third of the earth's life-forms have gone extinct. Cut! Stop with all the facts. This is debate club! But we're using a cable tv talk show format! What should I say? Unsupported opinions
"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."
"When I was a teenager 'Saturday Night Live' had Mike Myers, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman..."
Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Wondering. In my day, when a body said I wonder why dust bunnies are called dust bunnies, it led to all sorts of delightful speculation. We could while away hours debating whether it was a marketing ploy by big broom ... or whether it dated back to Napoleon, who had a fetish for dirty rabbits. And if we were lucky, opinions could get so heated that fisticuffs would ensue. Wondering is just one of many lovely human experiences utt
If You Can't Beat Them
I can't keep up, Randy. What happened, little buddy? You know how I created a hate-bot to automate my back you up in online arguments business? Don't tell me: The Russian troll farms beat you to it. No. My hate-bot became sentient and created an even snarkier hate-bot. Mankind is officially obsolete. For an extra $1, the HB-1000 will throw in racism and misogyny.
The last word.
Global warming debate.
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