Curriculum Champion T-Shirts

'I'm afraid your daughter isn't paying attention in class.'

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

Children's education

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

'Home Schooling'

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

"We thought this was more realistic."

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

'This is going really well. I did a great job organizing this lecture.'

"So basically you're telling us that you make the youngest of your species sit in a room for twelves years and that is an education. . . you're kidding, right?"

Help. High performing teacher trapped in low performing pay scale.

'Is that why our games of hide and seek are over so quickly?'

Kate's first task as new principal was to right a number of wrongs.

"History test? But I studied all night for a math test!"

Lessons.

'A restaurateur prepares macaroni and sells it as pasta. I want you to do the same for the educational program at your school.'

"I circulate around the classroom to make sure the class runs smoothly. I need a pair of comfortable walking shoes."

"Thanks for your report on flamingos Johnny."

'If you don't do your homework, you'll be a child left behind.'

'Your student Clara has tested as Talented and Gifted. But only in metal sculpting. You'll need to start incorporating metal sculpting into your daily lesson plans starting...tomorrow.'

"Should I refer to it as 'Common Core'?"

Parents teacher conference.

'Take this back to the committee. Since this is a school I would like the mission statement to mention education.'

Start of the school year

"Who gives you homework?"

"Tammy first, then Charles."

"For the next few hours, I'll be bringing you info with no tainment."

"Today we practiced counting to five, and the teacher practiced counting to ten."

'Today I have dumbed-down philosophy, followed by dumbed-down chemistry and dumbed-down English lit.'

'Come out of that cupboard. If you can't stand up to the class bully, who will? After all, you are the Headmaster...?'

Phrenology head filled with National Curriculum instead of real knowledge.