Culinary Literature Lover Gifts

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'Hard to follow...'

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

"Not tonight. Margie wants to watch some guy deep fry a duck on cable."

"Then add one extra large egg..."

Never write a sonnet on an empty stomach

"Bill just does celebrity cook-books these days, that's where the real money is."

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

Ordering Food At A French Restaurant.

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

Empty landscape containing food and stationery.

"How nice. A truffle."

"I'm not a food critic I'm a literary critic and I've found the prose on your menu to be second-rate."

'Would that be rare, or medium rare?'

A tureen of chefs

'The crepes of wrath.' 'Joad's mobile pancake store.'

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

"Keep it in the sling and rub hot sauce on our wing every 4 hours."

'We need more cake shows!'

"I'm sorry about the delay, sir, but Chef's anger management class ran over."

Not that one. It's got the chips in it.

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"Ooops...well, at least you now can see that there are a lot of fresh mushrooms in our soup!"

"1 pinch of salt, 3 pinches of baking soda...oh dear, a cup of flour? How many pinches is that?"

"Potatoes too salty? Look, buster ??" I told you to enjoy your meal!"

'What a wonderful evening, Chuck - candlelight, soft music and my favourite feed.'