Cubicle Jockey T-Shirts

'Thanks to the huge bonus, I find myself forced to admire you.'

How are you enjoying the job? I love the job. It's the work I hate.

'Welcome to the rat race.'

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

Another day at work would be one too many...

"At this office no two days are different."

National Boss Monument.

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

Man suffering from rope burn due to climbing the corporate ladder

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

"We should have taken the cubicles."

Work Slave

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

'Ms. Snack, prepare the conference room for an executive sting.'

"I tell you, it's a jungle out there!"

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

"Keep up the good work, whatever it is, whoever you are."

Busy day at the office.

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'They'll tell you this is an open office workspace, but watch out for the invisible fences.'

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

The Picture of Dorian Gray's Soul.

'Are these billable hours?'

'Miss Johnson, would you mind ordering me another computer? And you can cancel that call to tech-support.'

Stacked In Tray

One day, he hoped to hit the big time.

When the accounts department took the stationary cupboard Bob decided to book the Conflict Management course.

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'

Tired - Stressed - Tired.

'I need a smarter computer.'

Paper Trail