Cubicle Comfort Enthusiast Pillows

"We're allowed to hang-up artificial windows now to make our cubicles feel more like home."

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"My email is down... talk to me."

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

'Is that the sweet smell of success or some imitation air freshener?'

"If you could be in any cubicle, which one would it be?"

"On the plus side, I finally have a key to the executive washroom."

Food Chain, Inc: 'UP...DOWN'.

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

Office slaves.

"Yes, I saw the obituary. So, is that why you weren't in yesterday?"

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

Inout baskets.

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

'The boss put his picture up to enspire us. But it just isn't having that effect on me.'

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

'We feel it's very important to provide our employees with an extremely comfortable work-place environment. Primarily because we don't allow them to ever go home.'

Computer monitor for a head.

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

"We should have taken the cubicles."

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

"Best project manager we ever had."

It's a dogs life

Working 9 to 5.

"O.K., if you put it that way."

'Mr. McCoy has been expecting you. If you'll have a seat, he should be with you within the next 6 hours.'

Office Weather

Desk sign reads: Tom Bagley's Outer Shell.

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

Think Just Inside The Box.

'I have a typical nine to five job. It's enough work for nine people and I'm treated like a five year old.'

Do not think outside the box!

'Remember, Bob, my door is always open...just not for you!'