Covid Memer Prints

I've spent much less time with other people recently, but my refrigerator and I have never had a closer relationship.

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

Text Culture

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'We'll be outsourcing Main Street.'

'As you know, medical costs have skyrocketed -- that'll be fifty cents.'

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

'We're under a lot of time-pressure here, so we'll need to jump to conclusions.'

"Any further comments? Alright then, we're adjourned."

'It's been a tough quarter, so in lieu of bonuses, you'll all be receiving a DVD of out-takes from our meetings.'

'It was here when Harris decided to 'tweak' things a bit...'

"We're not doing virtual meetings anymore, Stu."

"Does our improvement really need to be so continuous?"

The Web is mightier than the sword.

'If youth is wasted on youth, I'd just as well spend my time social networking.'

"Are you kids going to behave, or do I have to put my foot down?!"

"Dislocating your jaw yawning during my lecture on work related injuries is NOT a work related injury!"

Accept cookies?

'You should see a doctor. Maybe you have that West Nile thing.'

"And then I met some computer people who could make it look as if I were talking."

'I see your site doesn't have a 'like' button. The good news is it doesn't need one.'

The Evolution of Pop Culture Scapegoats

'Now, 'ol doc, he'd have wrapped 'er the other way.'

"Poison ivy? No, I said you have a poison IV. Honestly, I have no idea why we keep that stuff right next to the medicine."

"I'd get back in there if I were you mate."

"I hope they're not fake commandments!"

'He was a lifelong knee-jerk liberal until he got knee replacement surgery.'

'She's a little upset. Apparently, when the cosmetic surgeon asked her what kind of chin she'd like, she thought he said gin and asked for a double.'

'Norton, couldn't you have taken care of that before the meeting?'

'I had to co-pay for the bagel.'

"My neighbor's house got TPed, and doubled in value."

America's Funniest Encrypted Passwords

'There have been some mutterings that the partnership council is just window dressing...'

Chatterbox Monkey

"I didn't endorse him, but I 'Liked' him on Facebook."