Cosmos Joker Prints

''Intelligent design'? -- Why, those patronizing little twerps!'

'From Earth? -- You're not that Geraldo guy, are you?'

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"The stars were much more beautiful from Earth."

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"Not now, Oliver."

"Is it true Dad...is the Earth really made of bleu cheese?"

'Boy, does this ever shoot holes in the old Big Bang Theory!'

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

'This seashell does not sound like the ocean... It sounds like someone yelling 'Look out!''

"And where do you see yourself in the next 7-8 billion years?"

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

Farmer chasing alien leaving crop circles.

E=Emcee Squared

'Did you check the glove compartment? -- maybe you left the keys in there.'

Pole Star

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

Astronaut sees cell tower on the moon.

Cosmonaughty

"Look what followed me home Mom. Can I keep it and call it Rover?"

"Your next pilgrimage must be to a bodega for milk."

Newton's cradle

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

Climbing to the moon

"You ghosts are pretty cool. I wish I could be more like you..."

"Dad, if there's a plot to the universe, can you see any spoilers?"

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

"And on the seventh day, God 'choked,' and all hell broke loose."

"You are hereby sentenced to one year of swimming with the people."