Corporate World Strategist Gifts

'Your proposal is innovative but threatens the status quo and therefore, my job. I'm shelving it until I retire.'

"And another thing, Beckton, I don't recall ever saying, 'Correct me if I'm wrong.' "

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"This position has become very important to the company."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Robot Parts $5

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

A fight in the Boardroom.

'Manager. . . Commander. . . Chieftain. . . King!'

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"Obviously some people here don't appreciate the gravity of our situation."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"