Corporate Stress Pillows

'This should be done within the next ten minutes because our company will go bankrupt in about fifteen minutes.'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

'I want to empower you to fulfill your potential! If you can work 16 hours today, then your 20-hours shift tomorrow should really elevate your self-esteem'!

Work Slave

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

"It's time you took a vacation, John. I said to 'marinate'... not 'palpate' the liver!"

'Our company has hit an iceberg and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

"The date protection policy is all about access to information, and we all know information is POWER!"

'Nigel, what have I told you about bringing your work home with you?'

Stress Busters - Doodle Maze - Leopards

'Sleep deprivation's the least of my worries; I can't get these amortisation bluebells to frangipane...'

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."

'Maybe we did pile too much work on his desk.'

"I think your idea of stress relief is drastic!"

'My poor darling! Did your boss put you under pressure again?'

Death Boss

"Every day is Monday." "Except Friday."

Unsuccessful board meeting.

Next, I recall looking down at myself and thinking, God, what a drama queen.

'No wonder I'm exhausted. Look at my horoscope.'

"Before we start can we agree to agree with everything I put forward?"

Amega Inc: Established 1991, incorporated 2003, paperless 2008, faceless 2010.

"I attended a leadership seminar, they learnt a lot from me."

Take your time coming back...they're looking for scapegoats.

Big desks take time.

Sinking sales

"Here a Goldstein and Company, if at first you don't succeed, you're fired!"

"That's Bridgeport from legal, he's got the consent forms."

"Stupid HR says you can only fire them..."

"What you must have noticed by now is that there is a very fine line between a success and a failure!"

"I'm your exit strategy."

"So what kind of mood is he in?"