Corporate Play T-Shirts

'Dad, can I go over to Kevin's house and play in his cubicle?'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

Welcome to the Team

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

Parade of Businessmen

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"You're on top of this week's Sales Pyramid."

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

"You know, there's a corporate elevator."

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

"Hank brings five years of top sales experience to our team so lets try to make him feel welcome as he makes you all look bad."

Scapegoat of the Year

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."

'As my subordinate, naturally I expect you to take the heat on things that otherwise would make me uncomfortable.'

'You're closer to the Big Guy than anyone. Will you help us kill him?'

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

'I suppose they call it the rat race because only rats ever seem to win.'

"I'm beginning to think they replaced the ladder of success with a greased pole."

'You don't get a raise with this promotion, but you do get to call your work area a 'work station' instead of a 'cubicle.''

'You turned the company around. Unfortunately, it wasn't our company.'

'He's a real high flyer!'