Corporate Negotiator T-Shirts

"Just to get the negotiations off on the right foot, I don't intent to concede anything."

"Damn it, name a figure, name a figure."

'The negotiation is in total deadlock. It's time for the medieval option.'

"Pistachio almond—that's the buyout."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Well, hey, Robin - it sounds like we're about ready for your suits to come over here and talk to mine."

"We see this as a win-win-lose situation."

"I'm afraid we'll have to postpone our contract talks. Our new negotiator quit. he won't work for the wages we pay."

'This is no ordinary deal I'm offering, Henderson - This is a big hairy deal!'

'Okay...3.5 billion in stock, 2.5 billion in cash, 80 million in deferred compensation, my own private jet, a luxury car lease for the next ten years, 3 club memberships and...

The merger is off.

'It's a good offer. I just don't think we should jump at the first one.'

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

Changing Minds

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

Do you want to win the game or my business?