Corporate Interests T-Shirts

"Anyway, enough about our current pollution levels. . ."

'That's our mission statement.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

Welcome to the Team

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Parade of Businessmen

'Before we starnt, has everyone shed their moral baggage?'

Businessman sees door sign 'Department of Mismanagement and Overbudget'.

XYZ Inc, putting a folksy, human face on unfettered corporate greed for over 50 years.

"How can you have a meteoric rise to the top in a one-story building?"

"You're on top of this week's Sales Pyramid."

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

"At the end of the day, I always feel I could have shifted more blame."

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

'Our company has hit an iceberg and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

'Remember - Reilly's Chairman of the Board, but Henderson's the Alpha male.'

"You know, there's a corporate elevator."

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

'Time machine materialises in Westminster Lord Lucan arrested'

"Hank brings five years of top sales experience to our team so lets try to make him feel welcome as he makes you all look bad."

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

Scapegoat of the Year

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."