Coping With Grief Prints

Denial Exit Now: Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance Next 4 Exits.

"Thank you for helping me grieve."

'I just couldn't bear to be without Floyd. So I had him stuffed!'

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"We laughed. We cried. But mostly we watched TV."

'Yes, death signifies a cosmic change of address. Alas, your husband's mail will not be forwarded.'

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

'He doesn't talk to me anymore.'

"I feel terrible admitting this, but I'm sort of glad he's dead. One less thing to keep track of."

"My wife and I handle our own finances. I'm an accountant and she's a grief counselor."

'He's a conspiracy theorist - he refuses to believe that Great Aunt Mildred is really dead.'

'Life is a precious thing, but simply breathing and existing isn't living...the end is inevitable for everything...I'm afraid that time has come for you, dear. I have to pull the plug...'

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Sorry, wrong room."

"After losing my partner, I felt lost until I realized I had not only an empty shell but also a short-term accommodation business."

'Let it go. Get on with your death.'

"Damn, I forgot to get her kugel recipe."

'I don't understand it! On earth he was deathly afraid of flying.'

"Well, well – if it isn't the old crystal ball and chain."

"He had a full two weeks."

'It's ok, sir, we'll put you in touch with one of our grief counselors.'

Hedgehog Mortuary.

"After Harry was gone I started decorating the house as a distraction. It was around the time I was wallpapering the driveway that I thought I should seek grief counseling."

"That's okay, I lost my wife years ago. Worst poker hand I ever played."

"Sure, it's disrespectful, but knowing old scamp, he'd want us to dig up his bones."

''On behalf of my colleagues I wanted to let you know that we are all crying inside.''

Great Joys like griefs are silent.

'Touching.'

"There, there. Try to remember how much he annoyed you."

"I can accept Mum's gone, but I can't bring myself to press 'delete'."

"I was able to get in one last lecture about diet and exercise."

The final stage of grief is acceptance. And the inevitable long and rambling acceptance speech.

A stranger in paradise.