Conversation Snipper Pillows

'Cut both both short. Hair and the conversation!'

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"You're such a good listener."

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

When did you first feel like a male trapped in a female body? When I was a foetus.

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"He gets easily abstracted."

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'My boyfriend's a Cardiologist.'

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."