Confidence Aficionados T-Shirts

"This sis my favourite place. It reminds me of me."

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

How Gary got his groove back.

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

'I lost my shoe, but I got my foot in the door.'

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

Self esteem clinic - Go ahead, take a number. You deserve it.

"I figured I'd start with one love handle and if you liked it, go for the pair."

Goldfish Insurance: " We must insure against a deluge of BIBLICAL proportions. . ."

"We always see a spike after April 15th."

Playing dead is easy, but when they ask me to speak, I have to imagine them in their underwear.

Never Apologize for Being Yourself

"If anyone wants me I'll be on the shop floor strutting my stuff."

"Why come to me? I'm only a humble doctor. You should see a healthcare provider."

"Look, I know you think you've got the stuff, but I'm telling you: walk God."

"I'm very good at acting like I know what I'm doing."

'...I'm the only one here who's outrageously high opinion of themselves is actually justified.'

'It appears she's none of her grandmother's subtlety.'

'That's what I like about the Big Guy - he's usually wrong, but he's never in doubt.'

"Why are you smiling?"

'I'm impressed by your self-confidence. What other skills do you have?'

'Does what's left of my bum look big in that?'

"You'll notice that I was born in 1968—a very prestigious year."

"I've always felt that what's good for me is good for the group"

The meek shall inherit the earth

"I am Baldonator, the meanest fighter around! No one dares mess with me."

Gosh, you're right - It's not important that you believe in the boogeyman, it's only important that I believe in the boogeyman.

'Thank you for not mentioning me by name.'

Have you ever known anyone famous? I have. I've always been great friends with Randy "The Rock" Taylor. What? That's you. Carry yourself like everyone knows you, and everyone you meet will feel like they SHOULD know you. HEY, YOU ALL OVER THERE! YOU KNOW ME! You don't carry things with your mouth.

"Studly"?

Just in from St. Paul.

"For God's sake, shape up! Is that the face of a power broker?"

"...and these are my children, Risk and Benefit."

Precisely when did you first start feeling invisible in meetings?

I'm a goddess. Love me forever.