Comprehension T-Shirts

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

"Bond James, Bond."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

Barks in code.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

'Holy-Kanoly' makes his infamous 'Leap-of-Faith' jump.

A boy acting suspiciously

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

"Your imagination is running wild. That's not a tiny drone sent to spy on us. That's just a fly."

Prejudice/Empathy

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

'I just love that little fluffy grey kitten!'

'More government surveillance!'

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

"I started my career as an industrial spy-here."

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."