Company Party T-Shirts

These were Bob's colleagues, all right, but clearly they hadn't received Funny Fred's global email.

Pizza time.

"At our last company part the new guy turned water into wine. I thought it was just a cheap trick, but now I know that he really is capable of miracles...he even understands pie charts!"

'Don't you hate people who blatantly use office parties to network?'

'And then there's Jeffries... He's been with the company longer than anyone. You know where all the bodies are buried, eh, Jeffries? Ha Ha! Keep up the great work!'

'You're employed here. That's a fireable offense.'

"In this company we never call a co-worker lazy. so next time remember to use the politically correct term non-ambitious."

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Children's Parties

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

21st century water cooler conversations.

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Bo're'droom

"The meeting will come to order."

Here and There Trays

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Cow Pinatas

That shows business confidence.

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

Sign - Halt manager crossing