Company Culture Commentator Pillows

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"He's worked here about two weeks, but he's been with the company six years."

"Looks like we found the issue."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"This position has become very important to the company."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

'You're my best man, Pomeroy, so I've decided to sell the damn company.'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

Spot the difference.

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

'Office' block tightening it's belt

Lethal Presentation

"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"

'We haven't improved quality, but we've made it easier to return.'

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

Satya Nutella

The Evolution of the Bonus

"Leadership is all about knowing who to delegate responsibility for all your mistakes."

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

"The announcement of the changes really went well."

'No matter how cynical I become, I can't keep up.'

"It's o.k., come on out."

"The company is very keen on diversity, could you reapply as a woman?"

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."