Commercial Manager T-Shirts

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'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

Hollywood Sign Developers

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

'Being the boss's yes-man used to be easier. Now you also have to 'like' him on facebook, follow him on Twitter, link with him on linked-in...'

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

CEO du Jour

"I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's more likely to be followed than following."

"Hoskins, try saying 'profits are up' without the finger quotes, okay?"

"On the plus side, I finally have a key to the executive washroom."

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

'The cash bonus incentives don't appear to be having the desired results. So, I've hired Rocky, here. He'll be providing the heads of the least productive departments with his own brand of incentive. If you know what I mean.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

'We divested ourselves of a division here, a subsidiary there, a branch here, an affiliate there...there's nothing left!'

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

'It appears the 'What?'s have it.'

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

The Corporate Ladder and the Corporate Elevator.

"And best of all, it comes fully loaded!"

"My preferred pronoun is they."

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."