Collector Of The Unusual Gifts

'I'm looking for the 'Congratulations on your Presidential Pardon' cards.'

"Any duck that thinks that decoy looks like a duck,swims like a duck and sounds like a duck, deserves to be shot!"

"This is Norman's little bureau of alcohol, tobacco, and firearms."

'Don't take the buyout.'

"You're on a what?!"

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

'This book is so rare it's never been published.'

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

'Oh, I don't have a problem, doc. My friend here has a problem.'

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

'Please enter your pin now.'

"My goodness, no! Grandfather would never, ever let us near this!!"

"Did you hear? It turns out old power cords are really valuable! Good things Dad kept them!"

A mummy begs for change in front of the pyramids.

"This will look great on our bedroom wall."

'It even tells time in metric minutes.'

'Not till you're sixteen.'

Reaction man - Road Rage Model

In the House of Picasso, the Cat: "You beast, you've eaten all the first class stamps again," Madame accuses Timothy.

An old gentleman speaking with a shoeblack at a train station

Man tried to unload a ship in a bottle.

The Old Curiosity Shop

Pianist.

'My boss collects stupid hats, Is yours for sale?'

'Jack and the Beanie stock'

Victorian Secret

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

I brake for anything discarded that I can bring to the antiques roadshow.

"I'm collecting everyday objects for a time capsule."