Cmo Mugs

Two plans - one long-term and one short-term.

Chief Acronym Officer busy at work

"Give me insights on marketing to your age demographic...and I'll give you a bright shiny penny."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

'It appears the 'What?'s have it.'

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

'We will not kick the can down the road... Does anyone know how to use a can opener?'

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

'How fast can you hype?'

Your ad here!

Ted did have some concerns about the appearance of nepotism.

'Looks like another bad PR week for the company. The whole media team got burned in our last email blast."

Communication Breakdowns

Commando crashes into wall, instead of through window.

"What do you mean 'upgrade' the server? The old one works just fine."

'Big-time operators are standing by....'

"The blaze has taken hold on the eight floor Chief. The C.E.O., V.P. and C.O.O. are trapped in the boardroom!!"

Former Fortune 500 Corporate Executive Until My Salary Became Linked to My Performance

We're from the City Zoning Commission, sir -- we've decided to tear down your house and put up a slum.

'It's time for a bold new direction...I'm changing my catchphrase from 'lock and load' to 'yank and crank.''

"If that's the chief medical officer I'm not here."

"The combover works even less now that you're using your back hair."

"I know honesty is the best policy, but maybe the second best works for us..."

'Before we begin, management has asked me to announce that it is the policy to discourage all staff members from speaking to the media.'

Musk: A short list of X advertisers and a longer list of Ex Advertisers

'I actually find my Ghillie Suit a better camouflage option than my stripes...'