Classroom Connoisseur T-Shirts

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"I'm sure your parents won't mind us using white flour. We're making paste."

'You can't just get up and leave without permission.'

"I must not be lazy".

"It was just after we both became Junior School teachers that we decided not to have children of our own."

"No, you don't get incentive pay for Billy Vincent."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'I'm having a hard time balancing homework and family time.'

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Moliere

C Day Lewis.

“Honestly class, where are your minds?!”

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

Charles Dickens.

Global Education

Bleak House

"How do we make sure the students' voices are heard, but get them to be quiet at the same time?"

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

"You're actually passing notes in class? That is so retro!"

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

'I was on my way to school, and some drug-crazed hippies took my homework.'

Beginning of the school year

"I said 'I quit'. Nobody listens to me any more."

"I knew there'd be pitfalls when I became a teacher, but thirty to a classroom is too many."

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

School boy

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

"Can't hear it at all, miss."