Childhood Anecdote Collector T-Shirts

'Look see? There's viola! Don't look right at her!'

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

Green Balloon

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

"I've been window-shopping..."

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

'Ok, go! Hurry.!'

Newton discovers surrealism

"Yes, you look presentable. Now get on!"

"Oh, it's not a baby book, it's his memoirs."

'Oh yeah, well, MY DADDY can scare ELEPHANTS!'

Doctor Jekyll as a child.

"We never have any activities that make for cute anecdotes anymore."

"Don't worry, I'll make sure she sees it."

"Hey, Frankie, remember me? Summer of '88—we were twelve and you buried me up to my neck and left me to die."

"I know about the tooth fairy, but I feel a bit young to be selling off my body parts!"

'Cheese.'

'Nobody told me anything about pre-registraton!'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'All hail the queen of static electricity!'

I've heard that you've beaten the Hare, so I've come to challenge you...

"Ohhh...I guess you feel slightly uncomfortable....Do you want to talk about it?"

"Lassie is merely billed as America's best-loved dog."

"You heard me. This is it. We had a three-picture deal."

Queen Ranavola of Madagascar executed any of her subjects who appeared in her dreams....

"The dish and the spoon? Huh. I did not see that coming."

On Display At The Children's House Of Horrors

'My composition is 'parental discipline and what we can do about it'.'

Empty Nest.

"No, cruel nature, WHY?"