Career Paths Pillows

"The tea leaves say you should go into insurance, but I say forget the tea leaves and go into whatever makes you happy."

"Me, too - started out as an entomologist, and somewhere took a wrong turn."

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

37 years in the same position.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

"Make a lot of money."

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

Go! Means NOW!

Beware the Dog: 'Hopefully I'll grow into the job...'

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

'Can you do more work then is humanly possible?'

"Pay more attention to me? I'm sorry, dear, but Mommy needs you to be more specific."

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"That arrow always goes to the bottom when I walk by."

Little Doctor meets Little Geneticists.

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

"Dave, could you hold on a sec while I take care of some personal business?"

I've been working 20 hours a day. Well, that leaves you four hours to get to work.

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

"This your resumé?" "Yes, it's a list of things I hope you never ask me to do."

"Sure, I'm a successful working bee, but sometimes, I wish I could have a family..."

"In addition to 'loyalty' are there any OTHER qualities you think you could bring to the job?"

"The boss can see you now."

"And finally, I’d like to thank all those people I stepped on and used to get here. I couldn’t have done it without your submissive insecurity and relentless resignation."

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

'Yes, we do have an incentive scheme.We call it 'continued employment'.'

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."