Career Path Ponderers Pillows

School of Baristas

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

The Hive, Inc. You mean I'll always be a worker, with no chance of advancement?

'I like the part of your resume where you didn't ask for a raise for 10 years.'

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

"I don't get it. I got a job at a fulfillment center and yet I'm still miserable!"

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

"She said that she's against combing marriage with a career....so I quit my job."

"Use your head, follow your heart and go with your gut."

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

'Nothing serious. I just hate my job.'

'And the recruiter from IBM - did you also tell him that at college you mostly sat on a rock by the sea, trying to find yourself?'

'I'm a hunter with gatherer tendencies...'

'At least hanging around street corners reminds us we're at a crossroads in our lives.'

"Exscuse me, but I think I'm in the wrong shaped hole."

Glenn Hoddle

"I'm going to make you a stay-at-home mom."

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

'What do I do for a living?? Isn't it obvious?'

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

'You've spent the last 20 years in college. What made you stop hiding from the real world?'

'Any backup plan in case your dream of becoming a YouTube sensation doesn't pan out?'

'When will it be o.k. to feel irrationally exuberant again?'

'Then after 'A' Levels I did an NVQ in Cleansing and Hygiene.'

'You're never going to follow me in my trade, Son - you may as well go to university.'

Career center: 'I'm planning to replace Katie Couric when she retires!'

"I wasn't smart enough for college. So instead of a diploma and a quarter million of debt all I've got is a growing plumbing business and a steady income."

Actually, with bachelors degrees in philosophy, we were lucky to get this job.

"In five years I see myself sitting on the shoulder of a successful pirate captain."

'And what do you do for a living Gary?' 'I'm a Puppeteer.'

'You were a boring accountant in ten previous lives.'

'You're at that awkward age where the others have figured out that you're a drone and you don't do anything.'

'The meaning of life?.. You want the next mountain along.'