Call Center Trainer T-Shirts

And after our practice sessions, I can't stress this enough - Do not breathe directly into the headset. It scares people.

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

"Sorry for the wait, our computers are down. We have to do everything manually."

"I'm a great ... umm... like ... umm... like... umm ... communicator."

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

"Did you remember to cancel the scam phone calls?"

'It just dawned on me that every time we make a phone call, it's a robocall.'

"Please stay on the line – your caul is important to us."

The Communicator

"I've been kept on hold so often, I'm really developing a taste for easy listening music."

"Hello?"

How it feels to be in a company with poor communication.

'Your call may be monitored to give us a few good laughs.'

'If you want to hear the ocean, press one.'

'I don't want to talk to any flunkies. Put me straight through to the computer.'

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

'I hate my life.

"Have you tried turning off your conscious mind and then turning it back on again?"

"If you want to talk to someone uninterested, press 1..."

"You can't say that to a customer!"

Automated customer service.

Stress

"For a list of the ways artificial intelligence is killing your job, please press one."

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

"I'm sorry, but you wait patiently on the line for an operator. We're looking for someone who immediately pushes 3 for more options."