Business-savvy Santa Fan T-Shirts

"Just as I feared. Tariffs."

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

Pole dancers

Electric powered sleigh with wrong fitting.

"As I understand it, he has a whole other workshop in Hong Kong where they make all that electronic stuff."

Santa Claus writes a 'Yule Blog'.

Santa's Workshop: Moved to China

'...So I figured with all of this free cooling why not install a data center?'

'Reindeer must now be fitted with the government approved CZ1 catalytic converter to reduce methane emissions.'

Santa's elevator

For Santa's Drone

"And this is where the magic happens."

'How things have changed Mr Twinkle.'

'It's all automated nowadays: Santa doesn't need to check the list twice anymore...'

"Santa's started franchising out delivery.'

Santa on street corner.

"Hey, you gotta give the old guy credit for at least trying."

"It's a great feeling to be able to give someone good news for a change..."

Boy Clause

'Santa sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been good, and he can find everyone's house with his GPS.'

"And his tell-all memoir reveals how he broke into every home and consumed over twelve thousand pounds of cookies in one evening."

Santa sits in the waiting room of a Weight Loss Clinic with other large people.

'Santa doesn't need us any more. He just sits at his computer and sends out music and film downloads.'

The Kindle was first used used by Santa to keep track of the lists of naughty and nice children, and was originally called the Cringle.

"Okay Santa. It's time to quit cyber shopping for today!"

'How come you're not registered anywhere on E-Bay?'

Computer screen says 'Have you been naughty/nice?' Santa says to elf: 'The kids send very few letters since you set up that website.'

Holiday Greetings

Santa Claus Christmas Texting

Re-Gifting/Recycling

Santa Text Exchange

"There goes another childhood illusion. When I was a kid, he had eight reindeer."

"...of course, you can always e-mail your list to my Ho-Ho-Hotmail account..."

Santa, tapping at mobile phone, turns away child saying: 'All Christmas lists must be 140 characters of fewer.'