Business Proposal Procrastinator Pillows

"We finally heard a response to the sales proposal...Sir?"

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Summarise all that's been said. I wasn't listening."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"See what I mean? It's going to take a bigger diamond."

'If that's a proposal, I accept!'

'I'd like your permission to enter into pre-nuptial negotiations...'

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

Is plagiarism the same as value adding?

'Oh my! He finally proposed!'

"File!"

How lazy people decide what to eat

Could I have a minute of your valuable time, Timpson?

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

Chairmen of the Bored

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."

"I know, but all promises are off when Daddy's writing his grant proposals."

Stupid ideas rewritten to sound like brilliant concepts.

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

"He's my hero. At 5 he just knocks everything off his desk and calls it a day."

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

Working from home to-do list.

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Why the discovery of the New World took longer than expected.

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.