Business Deals T-Shirts

"There. Now it's all on paper. Feel better?"

Chinese business cuisine.

'Selling my soul is out of the question, on the other hand, I may be amiable to entering some sort of leasing arrangement.'

'So, summing up: we 'like' you and you 'like' us.'

'In conclusion, the supplier who can repeat this phrase fastest with least mistakes wins the catering contract...'

'Watch it...I'm carrying a concealed weapon...my lawyer.'

Bar code meeting

They said the same thing, but in very different ways.

"And, in addition, you get a generous signing bonus."

"Perhaps we can arrive a a mutually beneficial arrangement?"

Had a great day, boss. Drove my ball into the water twice, lost three balls in the rough, and played the worse game in my life - I got him to sign the contract.

"This franchise deal looks great! But I can't see the fine print."

Handshake with crossed fingers

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."